Breaking up is hard to do

I may have mentioned on here before that I have a tendency to break things. And I have someone in my life that helps me fix them. Mostly because he loves me and is able to fix stuff, but also because if he doesn’t, I call him the worst friend ever.

I may or may not be a giant asshole.

I don’t always call on Dave when I need things fixed, I also call on him when I need help with things. Big difference, I know. For instance, my dad gave me a picture for my birthday last year. It wasn’t, what I call, wall-ready (it didn’t have a hanging wire); I also didn’t have a nail in the house to hang it even if it was wall-ready. I know, I’m useless. So I did the next best thing: I propped it up against my dresser and that’s where it lived for months.

One day, Dave & I were in home depot picking up hinges for a cabinet that I broke when I mentioned the picture. We purchased the necessary supplies and when we got back to my place he made it all happen. He installed a hanging wire on the frame and I put a nail in the wall to make myself feel useful.

A few weeks later, I purchased another picture that, again, was not wall-ready. Armed with my picture hanging supplies and my hanging wire know-how, I did all of it myself. I was pretty proud of myself and called Dave to get my congratulatory pat on the back. He wasn’t nearly as pleased about it as I was; he felt as though I didn’t need him anymore. I tried to assure him that there were plenty of other things in my life that I have absolutely no clue about; he wasn’t convinced.

A few months later, I purchased, yet another, wall hanging (for the record, prior to this picture buying spree, I had two things on my wall and one of them was a clock). The most recent purchase was large and unruly. The frame came with all the necessary accessories, handy-dandy instructions and wasn’t complicated (thank-you IKEA), but I was having a hard time wrestling it on my own.

Thus, Dave to the rescue. He came over and finished the job I started and we got it on the wall. This was several months ago. Fast forward to last week. I was lying on my couch looking at the picture when I noticed that it looked… weird. Upon further inspection (i.e. getting my ass off the couch) I realized that it was warping. The backing was bowing out at the top; I guess the frame is too heavy for the thin backing. (thank-you IKEA)

I took the picture off the wall and resisted the urge to call Dave immediately whining. I was going to see him two days later; I would whine then. And whine I did. He told me he didn’t know if there was anything he could do. He was inches away from being the worst friend ever again, but then he said he would come over and take a look. Phew. Sometime this year.

Then I told him that he better come over soon to fix his shoddy work.

I don’t know why he puts up with me.

Thanks Dave! (P.S. It’s June 18th!)