The Big Bang Theory

I mentioned that I've been working like crazy. Here's how my days are shaping up lately. I wake up (usually late), I feel tired/shitty/sick, I drag myself out of bed/house and go to work. While there, I run around in a decapitated chicken like manner. After far too many hours of not eating, working too much and losing at foosball, I head home, gorge myself on whatever is accessible (pizza, vodka, whatever) and head to bed.

Of course, Murphy's Law kicks in and no matter how tired I was all day (or even moments before), as soon as I get in bed, I start thinking about all the things I need to do the next day. Inevitably, it gets later and later yet my brain keeps churning away.

Eventually, I decide I might as well be doing something and pick up my book and start reading. Even though it's an alright book and even though I'm enjoying it, switching gears from reality to fantasy is enough to make me fall asleep.

I wake up shortly after with the book on my chest and the light still on. I shut everything off and then have a hard time falling back asleep. I toss and turn and think about all the things I need to do. No wonder I'm waking up feeling tired/shitty/sick every morning.

Last night was no exception to this sequence of events. Except... instead of waking up with the book on my chest, something else woke me. It took me awhile to realize what had done it, since I was in a semi-dream state; a little disoriented. That's when I heard it. And it was loud. My neighbour having sex right above me.

It wasn't just a little loud; it was really loud. And it wasn't just a little bit of sex, it was a lot of sex. Okay, it wasn't that much because it only lasted about 7 minutes. But still. Quite the rude awakening, let's say. But like all things, there's always the silver lining.

The funny thing about all of this, is not the fact that it took me two hours to fall back asleep. No, no. You see, the people that lived above me before, were heavy walkers and bathroom talkers. I assumed those two factors were the reason I could hear them. All. The. Time.

In the nearly 5 years that they lived above me, I never once heard them have sex. I kinda thought that maybe the house was actually insulated (or at least the portion of ceiling between the bedrooms), and the only reason they drove me insane was because they're heel-walkers and like to have conversations with each other while one is in the bathroom and the other is in the kitchen.

Granted, my old neighbours were a good, Christian, couple. So naturally, they don't enjoy sex at all. But still. To go from hearing nothing, to being woken up and hearing that, was a bit of a shock to the system. I'm really glad she's not into tantric.