Friday, April 20, 2012

Mexico 2.1

Sunday I woke up late (~1:30pm), between the sleep deprivation and hangover, I didn’t leave my room until 5pm. I handed in some paperwork, walked around the resort for half an hour and then went back to bed. I awoke around 8pm feeling much better; I got cleaned up and went out in search of food.

I left my big, blue cup at home because I “wasn’t really going to drink” and went about my night. Dinner, nightly show, followed by the disco once again. The disco, where I drank more than I should have… again.

The girl from the lawn was there, we started chatting and dancing. She got up on the bar and danced while the bartenders watched and continued slinging drinks. White girls seem to get away with pretty much anything in Mexico. At one point, she staggered over to me…

Girl - make out

I simply asked “Why?”, she responded with “Why not?”. I said “I dunno… I’ve never kissed a girl before”, she thought this was all the more reason to do it. Next thing I know, she’s kissing me.

Girls - kissing

She pulled away and said “So….??”, I shrugged my shoulders and said “Meh…”. She got all indignant and offended: “What do you mean “Meh”?! You didn’t like it? Why didn’t you like it?! What’s wrong with you?!?!”

Heather - into dudes

Then she walked away all in a huff and started making out with the guy from the lawn. I continued chatting up the bartender, Catarino, at one point he looked over at her and nodded in her direction:

Catarino: I don’t like her.

Me: Really?! Why not?

Catarino: Because she kissed you…

Me: Oh… … … okay…

Catarino: You kissed her too.

Me: So does that mean you don’t like me either?

Catarino: No, I like you.

Me: Why? What’s the difference?

Catarino: Because you didn’t like it.

I remember telling the bartender that I needed to go home; he asked if I wanted someone to walk me there. I pathetically agreed to the escort. The security guard took me outside and we waited for my escorts to arrive. I was really drunk and just wanted my bed. I told him this; he said we were just waiting for the other security guards to get there.

I told him I was just going to go by myself because I was tired of waiting and “was just fine”; he said “Show me”. I got up, took a few stumbling steps in the direction of my room; he said “No, no, no”, grabbed my arm and had me sit down once again. If his English was better, he probably would have said “Sit down before you fall down”.

My escorts arrived and walked me to my room; upon arrival, I immediately went to the bathroom to take out my contacts. But I was so intoxicated, I couldn’t do it. I assure you, this has never happened before. I decided sleeping with contacts in isn’t going to kill me one time and I staggered to bed and crashed.

I woke up the next day, surprisingly early, feeling, unsurprisingly hungover. I immediately hopped in the shower to wash away my illness; but I was feeling so under the weather, that I decided to sit down throughout the duration of my ablutions.

The shower didn’t have the best set up and the shower curtain was a bit unruly. I didn’t much care, given the state I was in. The moment I stepped out of the shower, I realized I probably should have cared a bit more. It looked like half of the shower water had escaped the confines of the stall and flooded the bathroom… and my entrance way… and it even went out my door.

There I was, completely hungover, trying to mop up litres and litres of water from my room using only my bathmat. It was inefficient at best.


  1. Oh dear - was SHE seventeen as well?

  2. This seems like a great trip to Mexico so far!

  3. Thankfully, I have to many family members tat live in Mexico to let me get drunk. Oh, there's nothing wrong with getting drunk, but men get rapey around tourists.

  4. I've ALWAYS wanted to kiss a girl, not cause i'm a lesbian (haha,trust me i'm 10000% straight!)but just cause it seems like one of those awesome experiences you just have to get under your belt!

    love your blog. /follows/

  5. No offense intended to Catherine, but how can girls be 10000% straight (even just in general, 10000% isn't possible) and still want to kiss a girl? As a guy, if I said I was straight as an arrow but I love shoving my tongue down a dude's throat, people would call me a flaming homosexual. And rightfully so.

    Glad to hear you didn't get raped... by a man or by a woman (or both? This IS Mexico, and shit gets crazy sometimes).

  6. Gorm - noooo. I think she was at least 25! I have standards... sometimes...

    Brian - every trip to Mexico is a great trip to Mexico!

    Nellie - I'm glad I didn't run into any of those rapey men.

    Catherine - now I can say I've done it, so when asked "Why not?" again, I can say "Cuz I don't like it". Mom always said you can't say you don't like something if you've never tried it.

    Beer - you're right... I would call you a flaming homosexual! :) Thanks - I'm glad I didn't get raped too!


Wanna brighten That White Girl's day? Leave a comment - they make me happy!