Monday, January 9, 2012

Video [games] killed the radio star

I've come to the conclusion that video games make me a bad person. And not in the fun way.

I don't play them all that often, so when I decide to turn on a game, it starts out innocently enough. I enjoy myself with the running and the jumping and whatnot. I question my reasons for not playing them on a more regular basis.

Theyre fun

Eventually, I start dying; my once-healthy amount of lives start to dwindle and I become more critical of my actions.


I start becoming more and more serious and more and more frustrated (because I keep dying!) . In no time, I'm cursing at the TV (yes, it's the TV's fault) and chastising myself for being a loser.


Jump higher... not that high!

Run faster... wait, slow down!

Okay, calm down... why'd you walk right into him - what's wrong with you!?!?!?

I'm pretty sure my neighbours think I'm insane because, I tell ya, I'm not quiet about it. After awhile, I decide a break is in order; my blood pressure is probably higher than is good for me. I start puttering around the house, but if I need to use any kind of electronic device, I have instant frustration.
Boot up faster, computer! I said.... Internet, is that so hard? What? Do I need to click you four fucking times all of a sudden?

Hello?? I said eject. Why aren't you ejecting? Just give me the movie, blu-ray, why do you want to hold on to it so badly? Are you in love with it?

I pre-heated you like an hour ago... why aren't you hot yet? Oh, get over yourself, oven!!

Once I walk away from the computer/dvd player/oven/my life with frustration seeping out of my pores, I realize I might have a problem. I've become a meaner person; I've become a complete and total rager. It's best that I don't get behind the wheel when I'm like this; I'm liable to murder someone.

Luckily I only have two more worlds of Super Mario Brothers to get through.


  1. Those dang plumbers bring out the rage in the best of us!

  2. This sounds an awful lot like foosball...

  3. Brain - it's more the goombas that are the problem. The plumbers are okay... well, sometimes they're idiots, but I really don't think I can blame them.

    Gorm - it is an awful lot like foosball...


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