Monday, May 26, 2014

Independence Day

Several years ago my mother told me that the reason I’m single is because I’m too independent; she said that I don’t need a man, that there isn’t anything I need or want in my life that I can’t get myself. Naturally, I disputed it, but she had a retort for everything I threw out there.

That White Girl - needs a man - having kids without sperm bank

That White Girl - needs a man - get stuff off the top shelf without a step stool

That White Girl - needs a man - opening jars are hard

That White Girl - needs a man - D-oh!!

Naturally, I dismissed it, but since then I’ve wondered if she’s right. Maybe independence isn’t a desirable trait; maybe I need to be more dependent. But then I started thinking about the alternative.

Take my stepmother, for instance; my dad does everything for her. Her responsibilities in life consist solely of cooking dinner and cleaning the house; dad works, pays the bills and even takes her shopping.

It’s to the point where if anything were to happen and my dad wasn’t around anymore, I’m pretty sure she would not be able to function in the world.

That White Girl - so dependent on my man - can't pay bills

That White Girl - so dependent on my man - can't count money

That White Girl - so dependent on my man - seriously how can you not count

This. Happened. I could not make eye contact with the cashier while she handed back one of the twenties as change.

All things considered, I don’t think my problem is a bad thing. Besides, I’ve also realized that I can’t do everything myself; I do need help. Take that, Mom

In September 2012, I bought a new TV. When I got it home, I took my old one off the TV stand, plopped it down on the floor and set up my new one.

Fast forward to September 2013:

That White Girl - needs a man - I should get rid of my heavy tv but can't lift it

It was still sitting there for a few reasons. First, I’m lazy. Second, I’m weak. Third, I have a bad back. All these reasons made it so that I literally couldn’t pick it up, get it into my car and bring it to the recycling depot.

Fast forward to last month:

That White Girl - needs a man - I should get rid of my heavy tv but can't lift it a year later

I did, however, make some progress; I asked a neighbour friend of mine if he’d be willing to help me get it out of my house. Fortunately, he said yes; unfortunately, it took him 3 weeks to make it happen. He was apologetic but I told him that it was a drop in the bucket compared to how long it took me to even ask for help.

Fast forward to yesterday: he came over and took it to the recycling depot with me.

21 months later, I finally have two square feet of floor space back.

That White Girl - needs a man - gets a man to lift a big heavy TV


  1. Coulda re-purposed it as a hipster retro coffee table!

  2. Wowee, almost two years!?! You could have rolled it out of there, one rotation at a time, once per week, and got it out of there faster.
    As for independence vs. dependence, it doesn't have to be one or the other. Who wants to be with someone fully dependent upon them to function? That sounds like a nightmare. Like living with a baby that never grows up.

  3. If having one man around the house is useful, imagine a gay couple's household. All of those TVs moved. All of those jars opened. The efficiency is just mind blowing.

  4. With all these CRTs disappearing, what are people doing to play Duck Hunt on now???

  5. Been there. My final solution is to not own anything heavy.

  6. awwhh that is exactly what my dad says to me too and i proved him wrong...wait i got no bf...oh well...elloh chocolate my old friend

  7. Anna - you're right - should have given it to Tom.

    Pickleope - that's a sad truth, indeed.

    Beer - that's the dream.

    Gorm - honestly, the thought never occurred to me.

    Hilary - I'm working on it. I can definitely see the benefits.

    Poke - sometimes chocolate is all a girl really needs!!


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